I met my wife when we were both college students at Harvard. We both considered ourselves feminists as young adults. This is because we had seen firsthand and heard about the damage done by domestic abuse against women. We both felt a strong desire to fight against such abuse and prevent other women from getting hurt, whether emotionally or physically. We both felt a strong desire to work towards a world where women and girls lived with respect, kindness, love, support, and the full measure of rights they deserve.

We still feel this way. We still feel this pressing desire.

From our perspective, then, feminism seemed to be the best path towards that world. But with each passing year, we realized that feminism was not a solution. In fact, it was part of a much larger problem.

The problems with feminist philosophy are overwhelming. From its very inception, feminism began as an anti-religious, anti-family movement. It is not merely one strand of feminism that is corrosive to Muslim faith. As difficult as it is for some Muslims to hear, it is all strands. To see this, simply read the writings of all the most notable feminist theorists in history, from feminism’s “first wave” all the way to its “third wave,” and this conclusion is undeniable.

Muslims need to understand these issues with feminism because many Muslims today consider themselves feminists, mostly for the same reasons that my wife and I adopted a feminist identity in our youth. This is dangerous because, as my wife and I discovered, feminism contains so much within it that is antithetical to Islam and that endangers Muslim faith. There are surface-level conflicts between Islam and feminism, and there are deeper contradictions as well. Meticulously detailing these problems is necessary, but as far as Muslims are concerned, we can start by simply judging a tree by its fruits. We have to ask ourselves: Why do so many Muslim feminists end up leaving Islam?

Women who identify as feminists are far less likely to be religious than the general female population.11 In the general population, about 7 out of 10 women say they are affiliated with an organized religion like Judaism, Christianity, Islam, etc. Among feminist women, however, only 1 out of 10 report any such affiliation.12

But does this indicate a trend of women leaving faith due to feminism? Other statistics support this contention. For example, between 1993 and 2013, the number of nonreligious women tripled in the US.13 Nonreligious people in general increased in this time range, but what is particularly telling is that the growth of the nonreligious women demographic outpaced the overall increase. In 1993, 16 percent of atheists and agnostics were women, but within 20 years, that number nearly tripled to 43 percent.14

Analysts contend that it is the spread of feminist and secular ideology through mass media and increasingly the internet and social media that is responsible for these jumps in non-religiosity.15

Beyond the statistics, many of us have seen these trends play out all around us in the Muslim community, so much so that it has become a cliché. Nowadays, women and men who have left Islam are writing about exactly what led to their apostasy, so we do not even have to speculate about the causes.16 They spell it out explicitly: Islam, the Quran, and the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم are enablers of patriarchy and oppression. In other words, Islam is not compatible with feminism, therefore how could a feminist be a Muslim?

Self-described Muslim feminists will strongly dispute that their feminism has put them on the path to apostasy. And, to be clear, I am not claiming that everyone who considers himself a Muslim feminist today will eventually apostatize. To repeat, I am not claiming that everyone who considers himself a Muslim feminist today will eventually apostatize.

That being said, not everyone who is thrown into shark-infested waters will fall prey to sharks, but the odds are not favorable. The stronger swimmers might make it out of the water bruised and bloody but still breathing, while everyone else is shark food.

Feminism similarly has devoured entire swaths of the Muslim community. If we care about iman in general and the iman of the next generation in particular, we can no longer afford to overlook this dynamic.

In order to address a problem, one first must recognize that the problem exists. This has been the frustration of myself and others. The Muslim community, especially in the US, does not want to acknowledge that feminism is noxious and a direct threat to faith. This is because, saying as much is politically incorrect to such an extent that misguided activists pounce with fury on anyone who fails to satisfactorily toe the party line.

But, as uncomfortable as it may be, we must confront the bullies. The silence must be broken and it is the responsibility of religious leaders, imams, and scholars to start calling a spade a spade. The stakes are too high and the outcome of the feminist malaise of today won’t be fully realized until later. In ten years or maybe even five, we will look back and wonder what went wrong, but it will be too late then. Action is required now.

My purpose here is to substantiate how feminism is a path to apostasy. The hope is that if Muslims understand this path, they will recognize it when they see it around them (or within themselves) and will be inspired to speak out against it (or reconsider their own path, much like my wife and I did many years ago).

Without further ado, here is the Muslim feminist path to apostasy.

It all starts with legitimate grievances about the way that some Muslim men treat some Muslim women. There are violations of rights in our community against women. There are Muslim institutions that ignore the needs and concerns of women. In some of our cultures around the world, girls are subjected to criminally unjust double standards vis-à-vis boys. And the kicker is that sometimes the responsible parties selfishly and ignorantly attempt to justify their practices of abuse and outright neglect by citing the Quran or certain hadith.

The solution to these problems is not feminism. The solution is correcting the ignorance with Islamic knowledge. And this is knowledge that comes from true scholars (ulama), namely ulama that are not under the suffocating influence of modernism, liberalism, and feminism itself.

But unfortunately, true knowledge is hard to find, so Muslim women (and men) have turned to feminism as a vehicle for expressing their frustration and their trauma. This is how Muslims enter the feminist path. And the results have been an unmitigated disaster.

If the abuse of women is a disease, then Islamic precepts and ethics are the natural, “organic,” wholesome cure whereas feminism is a harsh toxic chemical treatment, which might get rid of the disease but only by nearly killing the patient while creating ten more ailments in its place.

How does feminism conceptualize domestic abuse, masjid neglect, etc.? By shouting: “Patriarchy!” It is men as a category, we are told, who are the problem (as well as those women who have “internalized” patriarchy). It is men as a category, we are told, who inherently desire to dominate women, to abuse them, and to take advantage of them.

This is the illegitimate language used to address a legitimate problem. But then, that language slowly takes over…

In Stage 1, it was the tangible abuses of certain men (and women) that were the problem. In Stage 2, the problems become more abstract and conceptual.

Why does the panel at the Islamic conference not include any women? Why does the event poster have photos of the male speakers but only generic icons for the women speakers? Why is a male imam talking about hijab and what women should wear? Why are Muslim men concerned about what women wear at all? Why does the masjid have a partition between men and women? Why is gender separation (derogatorily termed “gender apartheid”) even relevant in this day and age? Why don’t Muslim men recognize their male privilege? Why is modesty such a big deal anyway? How dare men even talk about women’s issues! How dare men even opine about feminism (despite the fact that feminism accuses men of systematically oppressing half the population, and one would think that the accused should have a chance to address such grave charges, but no, that would be “mansplaining”!). Etc., etc.

The automatic answer to all these questions is, of course, the same as it was in Stage 1: “Patriarchy!” Unlike in Stage 1, Stage 2 problems are not defined by a grounded understanding of Islam and its normative tradition. They are defined and posed by Western feminist and liberal discourse. This is evident by the fact that Stage 2 Muslim feminists will rail against things that have a strong basis in Islamic law and its scholarship, like gender separation, modesty, dress codes, limiting women’s visibility to and interaction with non-mahram men, etc. But usually Stage 2 feminists are ignorant of this scholarship. And when they are informed that these practices are firmly rooted in Islamic scholarship, that is when they progress to…

In Stage 3, it is Islamic scholarship itself that comes under fire. In Stage 2, the grievances were about the practices and attitudes of contemporary Muslims. But now, that ire extends to Muslims historically, specifically the ulama.

If patriarchy as this overarching system is the source of so much oppression of women today, the feminist muses, then it only stands to reason that that oppression existed to the same, if not greater, extent in the past. In other words, the feminist in this stage asks himself, why wouldn’t the scholars of Islam throughout history operate under those same assumptions and through those same misogynistic modes of thought that we see from scholars today?

And when we look at the writings of the giants of Islamic scholarship, it is chock-full of material that feminism considers to be the epitome of the most vile patriarchy and misogyny. For this reason, you will find a lot of Muslim women in Stage 3 who started out by enthusiastically pursuing sacred knowledge (`ilm) with ulama or Islamic studies at the university and then came across these texts and were horrified by them such that they ultimately became disenchanted with Islamic scholarship, considering the whole thing tainted by nauseating patriarchy.

At this stage, the Muslim feminist contents himself with the idea that the Quran and the Prophetic hadith are solely to be relied upon because those are the only things untainted and unfiltered by the ugly distortions of men. But then, even that comes under fire…

Quran 4:34. Quran 2:228. Two witnesses. Inheritance. Incomplete `aql and deen. The majority in the fire. If I were to command anyone to prostrate. And on and on and on. We know the ayat and the ahadith.

How can the Muslim feminist reconcile all this? How could revelation from God contain not one, not two, but multitudes of seeming expressions of misogyny? This becomes a wellspring of delusion as the Stage-3-turning-Stage-4 feminist gropes for solutions:

Well, maybe these things have all been misinterpreted. Maybe if we bend and contort and reach, we can explain this verse or that hadith. Maybe we can reconcile the revelation that was seen and understood as the pinnacle of eloquence and wisdom and justice by people of the 7th century (and 8th, and 9th, and 10th, …) with the incoherent ramblings of 20th and 21st century secular gender studies professors. Maybe, just maybe! Anything is possible! This naive attitude can only be sustained for so long and only in light of ignorance of the sheer amount of Quranic ayat and hadith that fly in the face of modern feminism. The more aware of these ayat and hadith the Muslim feminist is, the more likely she is to proceed to Stage 4.

The Stage 4 Muslim feminist realizes that the only way to square the circle and fully reconcile feminism with the totality of Islam is to deny the divinity of the Quran and to deny the applicability of the Prophetic Sunnah.

In Stage 4, you will find Muslim reformers who outright say things like, “We must say no to the Quran.” You will find reformers who go so far as to insult the prophets and call them despicable names because, you guessed it: “Patriarchy!” In Stage 4, it becomes possible to casually utter blasphemy. It also becomes possible to advocate for things like women leading a mixed congregation in prayer, Muslim women being able to marry non-Muslim men, same-sex behavior being permissible, transgenderism being acceptable, adultery and fornication (zina) being permissible, and on and on. This is because those in Stage 4 have not only renounced any and all scholarly precedent, they also do not believe that there is anything like an objective, authoritative Sharia or Sunnah that can even begin to dictate a Muslim’s behavior. And anyone who claims to speak authoritatively on “What God commands,” is immediately denounced as a patriarchal oppressor (“authority” is a patriarchal concept anyway according to them).

Now, there are not many Muslim feminists who stay in Stage 4 because it becomes virtually impossible to justify all these things and still consider oneself a Muslim. The level of cognitive dissonance required to maintain one’s identity is crippling and the fact that the Muslim community at large is also (rightly) antagonistic to the blasphemy and disregard for the symbols of Islam coming from these individuals makes them increasingly bitter about being Muslim at all. Which is how we get to…

The mental anguish and torment at Stage 5 is unbearable. And it does not take much at this point to push someone over the edge.

If God is gender-egalitarian, why would He refer to Himself as “He” in revelation, as opposed to “She” or “It”? Why was the first human being a man and not a woman? Why are most of the historical narratives in the Quran about men and not women? Why was the last Prophet of God صلى الله عليه وسلم a man and not a woman? Why did revelation from God come to us via a man and not a woman?

This barrage of simple but maddening questions takes them to the cliff’s edge of kufr and irtidad. And then the same thought that drove them down this path in the first place gives them a final push into the abyss:

Why does God allow patriarchy to exist at all? Did He not care about the subjugation and rape of billions of innocent women over the millennia?

The only answer feminism can provide at this stage is the only answer it could ever provide at any stage: It was all a lie made up by men to control women.

The danger of feminism is that it works like dominoes. Once a person gets on the path of explaining everything in terms of, “Patriarchy!” the rest is just a matter of time. This is because the logic of analyzing every injustice by invoking patriarchy is too all-encompassing (but no less inaccurate, misleading, and destructive) of an explanation. The feminists in Stage 5 are simply more honest, more intellectually consistent than feminists in Stage 1, 2, 3, or 4. Stage 5 feminists have worked out the implications of feminism to its bitter end.

The reader might ask, “What branch or flavor or definition of feminism is really the problem here?” The truth is, it is feminism itself at its core, in its generality that is the problem. To draw an analogy, most of us will recognize that racism is a problem and that racism against people of a certain skin color or ethnicity is toxic to faith. In reality, however, the racism within the ideology of the KKK is not exactly the same as the racism within the ideology of Neo-Nazis or the “Alt-Right,” etc. There are nuances. But does it really matter when the core of racism is shared among all the disparate groups?

To be clear, my point is not that the problem with feminism is that it is a racist ideology. The problem, one of many, with feminism is simply that adopting a feminist outlook consistently and systematically leads Muslims into crises of faith and the leaving of Islam entirely. And this is not a coincidence or a statistical anomaly. When we understand the process of Muslims progressing from Stage 1 to Stage 5, it is clear how this happens. And if we are still not convinced, we can look to the roots of feminism itself, as expressed by some of its most notable figures throughout history.

From its very inception, feminism has been anti-religion. In fact, the most prominent figures of each wave of feminism have been viciously anti-religious.

From its beginning in the 19th century as a social movement for women’s suffrage, feminism in its “first wave” targeted traditional religion as the source of women’s subjugation. The earliest feminist thinkers believed that religious institutions not only contributed to attenuating women’s rights but, indeed, were the original fount from which anti-women beliefs and practices emerged. Susan B. Anthony, one of the central figures in the women’s suffrage movement, noted, “The worst enemy [women] have is in the pulpit.”17

Anthony often railed against traditional religion and was considered agnostic by those who knew her personally. Among her statements on religion, included is: “What a dreadful creature their God must be to keep sending hungry mouths while he withholds the bread to fill them!”18 On the idea of organized religion in particular, Anthony stated: “I can not imagine a God of the universe made happy by my getting down on my knees and calling him ‘great.’”19

Another early first wave feminist from the 19th century, Helen H. Gardener, wrote at length about the “crimes” and “abuses” of the Bible and Christianity in their treatment of women:

This religion and the Bible require of woman everything, and give her nothing. They ask her support and her love, and repay her with contempt and oppression […] Every injustice that has ever been fastened upon women in a Christian country has been ‘authorised by the Bible’ and riveted and perpetuated by the pulpit.20

Again, my wife and I considered ourselves feminists at one point, but alhamdulillah we quickly realized where the feminist path leads. Yet, abandoning our feminism was small consolation given the reality that some women endure severe injustice in life. Furthermore, how can the fact that Islamic law has different provisions depending on one’s gender be reconciled with an overall sense of justice and egalitarianism? These were questions that bothered us, but the beginnings of the answer came when we realized: Maybe we need to recalibrate our sense of justice and egalitarianism. And what better way to recalibrate than with the Source of Justice and Mercy in His own Words:

Ali ‘Imran (Q3:193-197)

Furthermore, Allah says:

Al-Ma’idah (Q5:48)

Allah will not waste anyone’s work, whether male or female, and Allah will only judge us by what He has tested us with, nothing more or less. Women will not be judged according to what men have been given and men will not be judged according to what women have been given. This is the standard of gender justice that Allah gives us in the Quran. It is not the case that men and women are subject to the same exact prescribed law. It is not the case that men and women are tasked with the same exact responsibilities. And it is not the case that men and women are endowed with the same exact traits. Just like Allah created different varieties of beings — angels, jinn, clouds, mountains, animals, etc. — and gave each class of being its own station and role in the Creation, similarly Allah has created men and women differently, yet they are still “of one another” (ba`dukum min ba`d). Muslim men and women must support each other in these trying and confusing times.

Additionally, all the kinds of abuse and mistreatment of women that those in Stage 1 are reacting to can fully be addressed by Islamic norms and guidelines as established by the Quran and Sunnah. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم summarizes these guidelines with his statement: “The best of you are those who are the best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.”30 Regarding physical abuse, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم specifically remarked, “Many women have gone around Muhammad’s family complaining of their husbands. Those who do so, that is, those who take to beating their wives, are not the best among you.”31

But the abuse many women endure is not limited to the physical. Emotional abuse and neglect can be even more devastating than physical blows. Many Muslim women do not feel cherished by their husbands, much less respected. Some feel as if they are nothing more than maids in their own homes. Yet, in the Quran, in Surat al-Mujadila, Allah Himself says that,

Al-Mujadila (Q58:1

Allah, Master of all that exists, manifests His Consideration and Mercy in hearing the complaints of mistreated women. How, then, could a Muslim husband be so callous and cold hearted as to ignore the emotional needs of his own wife? Furthermore, a detailed look at the life of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and his Companions shows that nowhere did they resort to belittling, insulting, or denigrating women, whether their wives, sisters, or daughters. Many narrations relate how these blessed men took extra care to be emotionally sensitive to their wives and to fulfill their rights towards them with ihsan, i.e., excellence.33

Much more can be elaborated on these points and more. For now, as Muslims, we must redouble our confidence in the power of Islam, not “feminist Islam,” to address injustice. The Prophetic example is our model and standard for gender justice, not the (often anti-religious) musings of Susan B. Anthony, Simone de Beauvoir, Betty Friedan, Gloria Steinem, or Bell Hooks.

I implore imams, religious scholars, and leaders to take more seriously the need to broach otherwise uncomfortable subjects like feminism that have long been avoided. Avoiding such subjects might have been fine in the days before the internet and social media, when the average Muslim could live without being inundated with anti-Islam propaganda. But today, avoidance is only likely to feed increasing dissatisfaction and disenchantment with Islam and Islamic scholarship.

This is because one cannot hide the “controversial” ayat, hadith, turath, etc., from the masses indefinitely. People will find out primarily because atheists and liberal activists alike are on a mission to “expose” Islam and are pushing these traditions into the spotlight. As the Muslim masses discover this information, they will feel deeply confused, deeply betrayed, and will leave Islam in droves. This process is already well underway. Simply peruse the prominent Muslim feminist social media outlets and the websites dedicated to Muslim women’s issues to see the rising antagonism and furor against orthodox Islam.

Rather than give feminism carte blanche to wreak havoc on the Ummah, we must redouble our efforts to critique and deconstruct feminism on an intellectual and academic basis. In the end, dismantling feminism will afford Muslims with the intellectual and emotional room to properly understand gender and gender relations in Islam and to see how far superior in terms of justice and mercy it is to what feminism has to offer