عَنْ عَبْدِ اللهِ بْنِ مَسْعُودٍ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ ﷺ: «مَنْ عَزَّى مُصَابًا فَلَهُ مِثْلُ أَجْرِهِ». [٤]
On the authority of' Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with him) that he said, "The Prophet (pbuh) said, "Whoever offers the consolation to the afflicted person, he will be rewarded with the same.” 4
عَنْ أَبِي بَرْزَةَ رضي الله عنه قَالَ: قَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ لِفَاطِمَةَ رضي الله عنها: «مَنْ عَزَّى مُصَابًا بِوَلَدِهِ كُسِيَ بُرْدًا فِي الْجَنَّةِ».
On the authority of Abu Barzah (may Allah be pleased with him) who said, "The Prophet (pbuh) said to Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her), "Whoever offers consolation to the person who is bereaved of his/her child, he will be clothed with Burd (certain kind of garment) in Paradise.” 5
عَنْ عَبْدِ اللهِ بْنِ عَمْرِو بْنِ الْعَاصِ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُمَا قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ ﷺ لِابْنَتِهِ فَاطِمَةَ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهَا: «مَا أَخْرَجَكِ مِنْ بَيْتِكِ يَا فَاطِمَةُ؟» قَالَتْ: خَرَجْتُ إِلَى أَهْلِ هَذَا الْبَيْتِ، فَدَعَوْتُ اللهَ أَنْ يَرْحَمَ مَوْتَاهُمْ، وَعَزَّيْتُهُمْ. [1]
On the authority of 'Abdullah Ibn Amr Ibn AI-As (may Allah be pleased with both of them) who said, "The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said to his daughter Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her), "For what reason did you go out from your house. 0 Fatimah?" she said, "I went to the people of this house and asked Allah to shower his mercy upon their dead and I offered them consolation.” 1
عن عمرو بن حزم قال: قال النبي ﷺ: «ما من مؤمن يعزي أخاه المصاب إلا كساه الله من حلل الكرامة يوم القيامة».2
On the authority of Amr Ibn Hizam who said, "The Prophet (pbuh) said, "Never does a believer offer his afflicted brother consolation and Allah cloth him out of his Honour on the Day of Judgment.”2
التعزية هي حَمْلُ الصبر وذِكرُ ما يُسلّي أهلَ الميّت ويُخفّف عنهم حُزنَهم ومصيبتَهم. ومن المستحبّ أن تتضمّن الأمرَ بالمعروف والنهيَ عن المنكر. وهي داخلة أيضًا في قول الله تعالى: ﴿وَتَعَاوَنُوا عَلَى الْبِرِّ وَالتَّقْوَىٰ ۖ وَلَا تَعَاوَنُوا عَلَى الْإِثْمِ وَالْعُدْوَانِ﴾ [المائدة: ٢].
Consolation means that to bring patience and mention to the deceased's kin what can relieve their sadness and lighten their calamity. It is recommended that it includes commanding the good and forbidding the evil. It also comes under the saying of Allah, {Help ye one another in righteousness and piety but help ye not one another in sin and rancor! } (AI-Maidah, 2)
هذه أوضح آيةٍ في باب التسلية.
This is the most indicative verse concerning the matter of consolation.
التعزية مستحبة قبل الدفن وبعده. قال أصحاب الشافعي: يبدأ وقتها من حين تخرج الروح ويمتد إلى ثلاثة أيام بعد دفن الميت. وقال بعض العلماء: لا تستحب التعزية بعد ثلاثة أيام من الموت، لأن التعزية تسكن قلب المصاب، وهذا يحصل غالبًا في الأيام الثلاثة، فلا حاجة إلى تجديد حزنه. وهذا هو قول جمهور العلماء. وقال أبو العباس: لا بأس بالتعزية بعد ثلاثة أيام، لأن المصيبة تبقى أبدًا. وقال النووي رحمه الله: "المتفق عليه أنها لا تُشرع بعد ثلاثة أيام إلا في حالتين: إذا كان المعزّي غائبًا، أو كان المصاب غائبًا أيضًا، ويُنتظر قدومهما بعد ثلاثة أيام". والتعزية بعد دفن الميت أفضل منها قبل الدفن، لأن أهل الميت قبل الدفن يكونون مشغولين بتجهيزه، والوحشة تشتد بعد الدفن. ويكون ذلك إذا لم يظهر من أهل الميت جزع.
Consolation is preferable before and after burying the dead. The followers of Ash-Shafi'i said, its time starts from the time when the soul is taken and lasts for three days after burying the dead. Some scholars said, consolation is not preferable after three days of dying, for consolation appeases the heart of the afflicted person and this mostly takes place within three days and therefore there is no need to renew his sadness. This same position was held by the majority of the scholars. Abu Al-Abbass said, there is no wrong to offer consolation after three days since the event lasts forever. An-Nawawi (may Allah bestow mercy upon him) said, "What is agreed upon is that it should not be offered after three days except in two cases: when the one who offers the consolation is absent or the afflicted person was absent as well. And they are expected to return after three days. Offering consolation after burying the dead is better than doing it before burying, for before burying, the people of the dead are engaged with preparing him and alienation is intensified after burying. This may be done if no anxiety appeared on the part of the people of the dead.
وَإِلَّا فَيُقَدَّمُ الْعَزَاءُ لِيَحْصُلَ بِهِ السُّكُونُ لَهُمْ.
Otherwise, consolation should be offered to bring quietness to them.
ومن المكروه أيضًا أن يجتمع الناس في مكان معيّن لتلقّي التعزية، أي ألّا يجتمع أهل الميت في مكان معيّن ويأتي الناس إليهم لتعزيتهم. وصيغة التعزية معروفة. وأفضل ما يُقال في هذا الباب ما رُوي في الصحيحين عن أسامة بن زيد رضي الله عنه قال: "أرسلت إحدى بنات النبي ﷺ إليه تخبره أن ابنًا لها يحتضر، فقال رسول الله ﷺ للرجل: ارجع إليها فأخبرها أن لله ما أخذ وله ما أعطى، وكل شيء عنده بأجل مسمّى، فمُرها فلتصبر ولتحتسب".
It is also reprehensible to gather in a particular place to receive the consolation. This means that the people of the dead should not gather in a certain place and the people go to offer them consolation. The formula of consolation is well known. The best of what can be said in this respect is what is reported in the two Sahihs on the authority of Usamah Ibn Zayed (may Allah be pleased with him) who said that, "One of the daughters of the Prophet (pbuh) sent to him and told him that one of her children is dying. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said to the man, "Return to her and tell her that, to Allah is what He has taken and to him is what He has given and to everything is an appointed term with Allah. So, order her to be patient and seek the reward from Allah.” 3
قال النووي رحمه الله: «هذا الحديث من القواعد الجامعة لأمور الدين، وهو يشتمل على كثير من الأمور الدينية، سواء كانت أصولاً أو فروعاً، أو آداباً حسنة، أو صبراً على أنواع المصائب والهموم، ويتضمن كثيراً من الأمور الأخرى».
An-Nawawi (may Allah bestow mercy upon him) said that, "This hadith is one of the most comprehensive rules of Islam which includes many religious matters, whether they are principles, subsidiary matters, good manners, patience towards all kinds of calamities, worries and discusses many other things.
"لِلَّهِ مَا أَخَذَ" يعني أن العالَم كلَّه له، فلا يأخذ منك ما هو لك، بل ما هو له، وقد استودعك إياه. "وَلَهُ مَا أَعْطَى" يعني أن ما منحك إياه ليس خارجًا عن ملكه، بل هو ملكه، وهو يتصرف فيه كما يشاء. "وَكُلُّ شَيْءٍ عِنْدَهُ بِأَجَلٍ مُسَمًّى" يعني أنه لا ينبغي لك أن تجزع على من قبض الله روحه، وأتمَّ مدته في هذه الحياة، فليس من الممكن تأخير أجله المحدد أو تقديمه. وإذا تيقنتَ بذلك كله، فاصبر على ما أصابك.
"To Allah is what He has taken." means that the whole world is His. Therefore, He does not take what is yours but what is His as a trust to you." To him is what he has given" means that what he has granted you with is not out of His Sovereignty but it is His and He disposes it as He wills. "To everything there is an appointed term with Allah" means that you should not be anxious for the one whose soul was taken by him, completed his span in this life and it is impossible to delay or precede his appointed time. Upon being sure of all this, you should be patient with what has afflicted you.
عَنْ مُعَاوِيَةَ بْنِ إِيَاسٍ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ، قَالَ: إِنَّ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ لَمْ يَرَ أَحَدًا مِنْ أَصْحَابِهِ، فَسَأَلَ عَنْهُ. فَقَالَ الصَّحَابَةُ: يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، ابْنُهُ الَّذِي رَأَيْتَهُ قَدْ مَاتَ. فَلَقِيَهُ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ فَسَأَلَهُ عَنِ ابْنِهِ، فَأَخْبَرَهُ أَنَّهُ قَدْ مَاتَ. فَعَزَّاهُ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ، ثُمَّ قَالَ: أَيُّهُمَا أَحَبُّ إِلَيْكَ: أَنْ تَتَمَتَّعَ بِابْنِكَ فِي هَذِهِ الدُّنْيَا، أَوْ أَنْ تَأْتِيَ غَدًا فَتَجِدَهُ قَدْ سَبَقَكَ فَفَتَحَ لَكَ أَيَّ أَبْوَابِ الْجَنَّةِ شِئْتَ؟ قَالَ الرَّجُلُ: يَا نَبِيَّ اللَّهِ، بَلْ أَنْ يَسْبِقَنِي إِلَى الْجَنَّةِ فَيَفْتَحَ لِي أَحَبُّ إِلَيَّ. قَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ: فَذَلِكَ لَكَ. قَالَ الصَّحَابَةُ: أَلَهُ خَاصَّةً أَمْ لِلْمُسْلِمِينَ عَامَّةً؟ قَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ: بَلْ لِلْمُسْلِمِينَ عَامَّةً ﷺ.
[1]
On the authority of Mu'awiyyah Ibn Iyas from his father (may Allah be pleased with him) who said once the Prophet (pbuh) did not see one of his Companions and he asked about him. The Companions replied, "0 Messenger of Allah, his son who you have seen has died. Thereafter, the Prophet (pbuh) met him and asked him about his son and he told him that he died. The Prophet consoled him then said, "Which of them is most beloved to you, to enjoy this worldly life with your son or to come tomorrow and find that your son preceded you to open whichever of the doors of Paradise you want. The man replied, "0 the Prophet of Allah, of course to advance me to Paradise and find it open for me is most beloved. The Prophet said, this is granted to you. The companions asked, “is it exclusive for him or is it general for all Muslims? The Prophet replied, "For all Muslims.” 1
عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ: خَرَجَ رَسُولُ اللهِ ﷺ إِلَى الْبَقِيعِ، فَرَأَى امْرَأَةً تَبْكِي عِنْدَ قَبْرٍ، فَقَالَ لَهَا: «يَا أَمَةَ اللهِ، اتَّقِي اللهَ وَاصْبِرِي». فَقَالَتْ: يَا عَبْدَ اللهِ، إِنَّكَ لَوْ أُصِبْتَ بِمَا أُصِبْتُ بِهِ لَعَذَرْتَنِي! فَقَالَ لَهَا النَّبِيُّ ﷺ: «يَا أَمَةَ اللهِ، اتَّقِي اللهَ وَاصْبِرِي». فَقَالَتْ: يَا عَبْدَ اللهِ، إِلَيْكَ عَنِّي، فَإِنَّكَ لَمْ تُصَبْ بِمُصِيبَتِي. قَالَ أَبُو هُرَيْرَةَ: فَتَرَكَهَا النَّبِيُّ ﷺ، وَكَانَ هُنَاكَ رَجُلٌ شَهِدَ هَذَا الْمَشْهَدَ، فَجَاءَ إِلَى هَذِهِ الْمَرْأَةِ وَسَأَلَهَا: مَاذَا قَالَ لَكِ هَذَا الرَّجُلُ؟ فَأَخْبَرَتْهُ بِمَا قَالَ، وَبِمَا رَدَّتْ عَلَيْهِ. فَسَأَلَهَا الرَّجُلُ: هَلْ عَرَفْتِهِ؟ قَالَتْ: لَا، وَاللهِ. فَقَالَ لَهَا: وَيْحَكِ! إِنَّهُ رَسُولُ اللهِ ﷺ. فَمَضَتْ مُسْرِعَةً حَتَّى أَتَتْهُ، فَقَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللهِ، إِنِّي لَمْ أَعْرِفْكَ، فَقَالَ ﷺ: «إِنَّمَا الصَّبْرُ عِنْدَ الصَّدْمَةِ الْأُولَى». [رواه البخاري ومسلم]
On the authority of Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) who said, "The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) went out to AI-Baqr and he saw a woman wailing on a grave. He said to her, "0 the servant of Allah, fear Allah and be patient". She replied, "0 the servant of Allah, if you were afflicted with what I have been, you would excuse me!" The Prophet said to her, "0 servant of Allah, fear Allah and be patient.” She replied, "0 the servant of Allah, I heard what you said, so let me alone. Abu Hurairah said, "The Prophet let her alone and there was a man who witnessed this scene and came to this woman and asked her what did this man (the Prophet) say to her? She told him what he said and with what she replied him. The man asked her did you know him? She replied, "No, By Allah." He said, "Woe to you! He is the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him). Thereupon, she quickly walked towards him until she reached him and said, "0 Messenger of Allah, I will be patient". The Prophet said, "Patience is at the time of the suddenness of the calamity.” 2
هذا يعني أن الصبر يكون أفضل عند أول الصدمة ومفاجأة المصيبة، أما بعد ذلك فإن السلوان يحصل لا محالة.
This means that the patience is more virtuous at the suddenness of the calamity, but after that, solace, of course, takes place.
في صحيح مسلم أنه روي: «أن ابناً لأبي طلحة مات، فقالت امرأته أم سليم لأهلها: لا تحدثوا أبا طلحة بابنه حتى أكون أنا أحدثه، فلما جاء أبو طلحة قربت إليه العشاء فأكل وشرب، ثم تصنعت له أحسن مما كانت تصنع قبل ذلك، فوقع بها».
In Sahih Muslim, it is reported that, "Once one of Abu Talha's sons died. His wife, Umm Salim said to his family, don't tell Abu Talha and I will tell him myself upon returning of Abu Talha, she offered the dinner for him and he ate and drank. Then she made up herself more than she did for him before that and Abu Talha had sexual intercourse with her.
فلما رأى أنه قد استراح منها، قالت: يا أبا طلحة، ما تقول في قوم أعاروا عاريةً، ثم طلبوا عاريتهم، هل لهم أن يمنعوهم ذلك؟ قال: لا. قالت أم سليم: فاحتسب ابنك، فقد رُدَّت وديعةُ الله إليه.
Upon realizing that he satisfied himself from her, she said, 0 Abu Talha, what do you say about some people who lent something to others, then they demanded their right, do other people have the right to deny them this thing? He replied, "No". Umm Salim said, "Deem your son as a trust which returned to Allah.
قال أبو طلحة مغضباً: أتتركني حتى أتلطخ بك، ثم تخبرني بابني؟ والله لن يجعلني هذا أصبر أبداً. ثم ذهب إلى رسول الله ﷺ وأخبره بما حدث. فقال رسول الله ﷺ: «بارك الله لكما في ليلتكما».1
Abu Talha got angry and said, do you leave me until I stain myself with you then you told me about my son. This, by Allah will never cause me to be patient. Then he went to the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) and told him about what had happened. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him said, "May Allah bless your night for you both.”1
وفي رواية أخرى ورد أنه قال: «ما أُعطي أحدٌ عطاءً خيرًا وأوسع من الصبر» [2]
In another narration, it is reported that, "With the best and all-embracing good, no one is granted something better than patience.” 2
قال علي بن أبي طالب (رضي الله عنه) للأشعث بن قيس: "الزم الصبر، واعدد موتاك أمانةً رُدّت إلى عند الله، وإلا فإنك تفعل ما تفعله البهائم."
كتب حكيمٌ إلى رجلٍ مبتلى يقول: "لقد فقدتَ ما ابتُليتَ به، فلا يفوتنّك أجره، أي الثواب."
وقال آخر: "يفعل العاقل في اليوم الأول من مصيبته ما يفعله الجاهل في اليوم الخامس من مصيبته."
ومن المعلوم أن مرور الزمن يسلّي المبتلى ويخفف عنه، ولذلك أمر الشارع الناس بالصبر عند الصدمة الأولى للمصيبة. وقد قيل للإمام الشافعي (رضي الله عنه) إن عبد الرحمن بن مهدي فقد أحد أبنائه، وكان شديد القلق والجزع لوفاته، فأرسل إليه الشافعي رسالةً يقول فيها: "يا أخي، عزِّ نفسك بما تعزّي به غيرك، واكره من نفسك ما تكرهه من فعل غيرك."
Ali Ibn Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with him) said to Al-Ashas Ibn Qays, "Be committed to patience and count your dead as a trust which returned to Allah's keeping, otherwise you are behaving the way the animals do.” A wise man wrote to an afflicted man saying, "You lost what you have been afflicted with, so do not let its compensation i.e., the reward, miss you also." Another man said, "The sane person does on the first day of his calamity what the foolish person does on the fifth day of his calamity." It is well-known that the passing of time consoles and relieves the afflicted person. Therefore the lawgiver ordered the people to be patient on the suddenness of calamity. Once Ash-Shafi'i (may Allah be pleased with him) was told that Abdul-Rahman Ibn Mahdi lost one of his sons and he was very anxious and distressed because of his death. Thereupon, Ash-Shafi'i sent him a message saying, "O my brother console yourself with what you console others with and detest from yourself what you detest from other's doings.
واعلم أن أعظم المصيبة ما حُرم به الإنسان الأجر والثواب، فما قولك في اجتماع هذين الأمرين مع ارتكاب الذنب؟ فبادر إلى قدرك وهو قريب منك قبل أن تطلبه وهو بعيد عنك. أسأل الله أن يرزقك الصبر عند المصيبة، وأن يثيبك ويثيبنا عليها.
وكتب رجل إلى بعض إخوانه يعزيه بوفاة ابنه قائلاً: "ما دام الولد حياً، فهو مصدر حزن وابتلاء لأبيه، فإذا مات صار دعاءً ورحمةً لأبيه. فلا تحزن على ما فاتك، فقد فاتك حزنه وابتلاؤه، ولا تفقد الدعاء والرحمة التي يمنحك الله إياها."
Be sure that the most grievous calamity is the one which deprives the person the delight and the reward, so what do you say about the combination of these two thing and the doing of a sin? So hasten to your destiny while it is near to you before demanding it while it goes far from you. May Allah grant you patience at times of calamity and reward you and us for it." A man wrote to some of his brothers to console him because of the death of his son saying" "As long as the son is living, he is a source of sadness and trial for his father, but when he dies he becomes a prayer and a mercy for his father. Therefore, don't be sad for what you missed, you missed his sadness and trial and do not lose the prayer and mercy which Allah offers you.
قال موسى بن المهدي معزياً إبراهيم بن سلامة في وفاة ابنه: "أَلَمْ يكن سروراً وإن كان فتنةً وبلاءً، فلما مات صار حزناً، ثم صار دعاءً ورحمةً؟"
Musa Ibn Al-Mahhdi consoled Ibrahim Ibn Salamah on the death of his son saying, "Was not he a source of happiness although he was a calamity and a trial but when he died, he became a source of sadness then he became a prayer and mercy?
قال رجلٌ لآخر يُعزّيه: «الذي سيكون لك أجرًا في الآخرة خيرٌ من الذي كان مَسرّتك وسعادتك في الحياة الدنيا».
ويُروى أنّ عبد الله بن عمر رضي الله عنهما دفن أحد أبنائه فضحك عند القبر. فسُئل: أتضحك وأنت واقفٌ عند القبر؟ فأجاب: لقد غلبني الشيطان.
قال ابن جريج رحمه الله: «مَن لم يصبر عند المصيبة، ويعتبر ميّته أمانةً عند الله، فإنه يتصرّف كما تتصرّف البهائم».
قال حامد الأعرج: رأيتُ سعيد بن جبير يقول لابنه وهو ينظر إليه: «أعرف فيك خصلةً معيّنة». فقيل له: ما هي؟ فأجاب: «أنه سيموت، وأنا أعتبره أمانةً تُردّ إلى حفظ الله».
A man consoled another saying, "the one who will be a reward for you in the hereafter is better than the one who was a source of your delight and happiness in the worldly life." It is also reported that Abdullah Ibn 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) buried one of his sons and laughed at the grave. He was asked do you laugh while you are still standing at the grave? He replied, I was to over come by Satan. Ibn Jarih (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "Whoever is not be patient at the time of calamity and deem his dead as a trust which is in Allah's keeping, he will behave the way the animals do." Hamid AI-Araj said, "I saw Sa'id Ibn Jubair saying to his son and looking at him, I know a particular characteristic of you. He was asked what is it? He replied, "He will die and I will deem him as a trust which is returned to Allah's keeping.
قال الحسن البصري رحمه الله: «كان رجل حزيناً جداً لوفاة ابنه، فشكا ذلك إليه، فقال الحسن: أكان ابنك غائباً عنك قبل وفاته؟ فأجاب الرجل: نعم، وكان غيابه أكثر من حضوره. فقال الحسن: فاعتبر غيابه إذاً غياباً دائماً، لكن هذه المرة ستكون أعظم أجراً لك».
AI-Hasan Al-Basri (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that, "A man was very sad because of the death of his son and he complained this to him. AI-Hasan said, "Was your son absent from you before his death? The man replied, "Yes, his absence was more than his attendance. AI-Hasan said,"So deem his absence forever but this time will be the most rewarding for you.
قَالَ الرَّجُلُ: يَا أَبَا سَعِيدٍ، لَقَدْ أَزَلْتَ قَلَقِي بِشَأْنِ ابْنِي.
The man said, O Abu Sa'id, You appeased my anxiety about my son.
مرّةً دخل عمرُ بنُ عبدِ العزيزِ على ابنِه وهو مريضٌ، فقال: "يا بُنيَّ، كيف أنت؟" فقال: "وجدتُ نفسي في الحقّ." فقال عمر: "يا بُنيَّ، أن أكون في ميزانك! أحبُّ إليّ أن أكون في ميزانك" (يقصد عمرُ أنّ ذنوبَه أكثرُ من ذنوبِ ابنِه). فقال الابن: "يا أبي، أن يُعطى ما تحبّ أحبُّ إليّ من أن يُعطى ما أحبّ."
ومرّةً أصاب عُروةَ مرضٌ في رِجلِه، فاضطُرّ إلى قطعِها، فقطعها بنفسِه مع أنّه كان شيخاً كبيراً، ولم يترك ذِكرَه الكثيرَ الذي كان يُداومُ عليه في هذه الليلة، بل تلا قولَ اللهِ تعالى: {آتِنَا غَدَاءَنَا لَقَدْ لَقِينَا مِن سَفَرِنَا هَٰذَا نَصَبًا} [الكهف: 62].
Once 'Umar Ibn 'Abedul-' Aziz entered upon his son while he was ill and said, "0 my son, how are you?" He replied, "I found myself in the truth." 'Umar said, O my son, to be in my scale! It is more beloved for me to be in your scale ('Umar mean that his sins are more than his son's." The son replied, "O my father, to be granted what you love is more beloved to me than to be granted what I love." Once, 'Urwah was attacked by disease in his leg and he was obliged to cut it off and he cut it off himself despite he was an old man. He did not leave out his oft-frequently remembrance which he used to do on this night, but he recited Allah's saying, {Bring as our early meal, truly we have suffered much fatigue at this (stage of) our journey} (AI-Kahf: 62)
وقال أيضًا (رضي الله عنه): «اللهم إن ابتليتني فقد عافيتني، وإن أخذت مني شيئًا فقد أبقيت لي كثيرًا؛ أخذت عضوًا وأبقيت لي أعضاء كثيرة، وأخذت ولدًا وأبقيت لي أولادًا كثيرين». وفي تلك الليلة دخل رجل من بني عبس على الوليد بن عبد الملك، فسأله الوليد عن عينه، فقال الرجل: «بتُّ ليلة في قمة واد، ولم أكن أعرف أحدًا من بني عبس أكثر مالًا مني، ثم أصابنا سيل جارف، فذهب مالي وأهلي وأولادي، ولم يبقَ إلا جمل وابن لي. وكان الجمل شديد النفور، فهرب، فتبعته، ولم أترك ابني إلا مسافة قصيرة، فسمعت صراخه، فرجعت إليه فوجدت رأسه تحت بطن الجمل، فقد قتله. ثم تبعت الجمل لأمسكه، فركلني برجله، فشوّه وجهي وفقأ عيني. فصرت محرومًا من أهلي ومالي وولدي وجملي». فقال الوليد: «خذوا هذا الرجل وأْتوا به عروة ليعلم أن هناك كثيرين ممن هم أشد بلاءً منه». وروي أيضًا أنه لما هُجم على عثمان (رضي الله عنه) وضُرب، قال والدم يسيل على لحيته: «لا إله إلا أنت سبحانك، إني كنت من الظالمين. اللهم إني أستعينك عليهم، وأستعينك في أموري كلها. اللهم إني أسألك الصبر على ما ابتليتني به».
He (may Allah be pleased with him) also said, "OAllah! If You afflicted me, you truly relieved me and if you took something, truly you saved me many others. You took one organ and saved for me many others and you took a son and saved me many others. On the same night a man from Banu Abs entered upon Al- Walid Ibn Abd ul-Malik. AI-Walid asked him about his eye. The man said, "I spent one night in the peak of a valley and I didn't know anyone from Bany , Abd who may be more rich than me. Then we were afflicted with a torrent. Consequently, all my property, family and children were destroyed with exception of a camel and a son. The camel was very reluctant and it ran away and I started to follow it. I did not leave my son except for a short distance and I heard his crying. I returned to him and I found his head under its belly and it killed him. Then I followed the camel to catch it, but it kicked me with its foot and it disfigured my face and blinded my eye. Then I became deprived of my family, my property, my son and my camel." Thereupon, AI-Walid said, "Take this man and bring him before 'Urwah so he knows that there are many others who are more afflicted than him." It is also reported that, when 'Uhman (may Allah be pleased with him) was attacked and beaten, he said while blood was flowing upon his beard, "There is no God but Allah, Glory be to you. Truly I was one of those who wronged themselves. O Allah! I seek Your help against them and I seek Your help in all my affairs.O Allah! I ask You to grant me patience on what You afflicted me with.
قال المدائنی: رأيتُ في البادية امرأةً جميلةً جدًّا، فقلتُ: والله إنّ هذه المرأة لَمُوسِرةٌ غنيةٌ. فقالت: والله ليس الأمر كذلك، لقد لقيتُ كثيرًا من الشدائد والهموم، وسأحكي لك قصتي. كنتُ متزوجةً من رجلٍ وكان لنا ولدان. وفي يوم عيد الأضحى ذبح أبوهما شاةً، وكان الولدان يلعبان. فقال الابنُ الأكبرُ لأخيه الأصغر: أتريد أن أريَك كيف ذبح أبي الشاةَ؟ فقال الأصغر: نعم. فذبح الأكبرُ أخاه، فلما رأى أخاه يتشحّط في دمه فزع فزعًا شديدًا، وهرب نحو الجبل، فافترسه ذئب. وتبعه أبوه ليردّه، فضلّ الطريق في الصحراء، فمات جوعًا، فبقيتُ وحيدةً. فسألها المدائني: كيف صبرُكِ؟ فقالت: إن صحبني الصبرُ صبرتُ، ولكنها جراحةٌ قد اندملت.
عن ابن عباس رضي الله عنهما قال: سمعتُ رسولَ الله ﷺ يقول: «من كان له ولدانِ فماتا في حياته دخل الجنة». فقالت عائشةُ: بأبي أنت وأمي يا رسول الله، فمن كان له ولدٌ واحد؟ فقال رسولُ الله ﷺ: «له الأجرُ نفسُه». قالت عائشة: فمن لم يكن له ولدٌ من أمتك؟ قال: «أنا فَرَطُ أمتي، ولم يُصابوا بمصيبةٍ أشدَّ من مصيبتي (بموتي)».
AI-Mada'ni said, "I saw in the desert a very beautiful woman and I said, "By Allah, this woman is surely a very prosperous and rich. She said, "By Allah, this is not true, I suffered many distresses and worries and I will tell you my story. I was married to a man and we had two children. On the day of 'Eidul- Adha (Feast of Sacrifice), their father slaughtered a sheep and they were playing. The elder son said to his younger brother, do you want me to show you how my father slaughtered the sheep? The younger son said, 'Yes'. Then the elder son slaughtered his brother and when he saw his brother bleeding he was very scared and ran away towards the mountain and a wolf devoured him. His father followed him to bring him back, but he lost his way in the desert and he died from hunger and I became lonely. Al-Mada'ni asked her, "How are you with patience?" She said, "If it accompanies me, I will abide by it, but it was a wound and I recovered." On the authority of Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) who said, "I heard the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) saying, "Whoever has two sons and they died in his lifetime, he will enter Paradise. Aishah asked, "May my father and mother be a compensation for you! What about the one who has one son?" The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing be upon him) said, "He will have the same reward" 'Aishah proceeded, "What about the one who has none of your Ummah?' He said, "I am the forerunner of my Ummah and they were not afflicted with a more grievous calamity than mine (death).” 1
عن أبي عبيدة، عن أبيه رضي الله عنه، قال: قال رسول الله ﷺ: «من كان له ثلاثة من الولد لم يبلغوا الحنث، كانوا له حصنًا من النار». فقال أبو الدرداء، وفي رواية أبو ذر: قدّمتُ اثنين. فقال النبي ﷺ: «واثنان». فقال أُبيّ بن كعب سيد قراء القرآن الكريم: قدّمتُ واحدًا. فقال النبي ﷺ: «وواحد، ولكن ذلك عند الصدمة الأولى».
One the authority of Abu Ubaidah (may Allah be pleased with him) from his father who said, "The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, "Whoever has three sons and they died in his lifetime before attaining the age of puberty, they will be a protection for him from the Hell-Fire." Abu AI-Darda, and in another narration Abu Dharr, said, "I introduced two sons. The Prophet said, "They will bring you the same reward. Ubai Ibn Ka'b, the muster of the readers of the Glorious Qur'an said, "I introduced one. " The Prophet (pbuh) said, "He will bring you the same reward, but this is at the time of the suddenness of the calamity.” 2
عن وكيع قال: كان لإبراهيم الحربي ابن، بلغ إحدى عشرة سنة، فحفظ القرآن الكريم، وكان عالماً بالفقه والحديث، فمات، فذهبتُ أعزّي أباه، فقال لي: كنتُ أتمنى موته. فقلت: يا أبا إسحاق، كيف تقول مثل هذا وأنت في هذه المنزلة بين العلماء؟ فقد كان ابنك رجلاً، حفظ القرآن، وكان عالماً بالفقه والحديث. فقال: رأيتُ في المنام كأنّ القيامة قد قامت، وإذا بأطفال كثيرين يحملون أكواب الماء، ويلقون الناس ليسقوهم، وكان اليوم شديد الحرّ، فقلتُ لأحدهم: أعطني ماءً. فنظر إليّ وقال: أنت أبي! فقلتُ: من أنت؟ قال: نحن الأطفال الذين ماتوا على دين الإسلام، وسبقنا آباءنا لنسقيهم الماء. ولهذا كنتُ أرجو موته.
وروى مسلم عن أبي حسّان قال: قلتُ لأبي هريرة: حدّثنا عن شيءٍ يُخفّف عنا حزننا على موتانا. فقال: هم أطفال من أطفال الجنة، يلقون آباءهم أو قال: أبويهم، فيأخذون بثيابهم أو قال: بأيديهم، فلا يفارقونهم حتى يُدخلهم الله الجنة.
On the authority of Waki' who said,"There was a son for Ibrahim AI-Harbi and he was eleven years when he memorized the Glorious Qur'an and was knowledgeable in Fiqh and Hadith. He died and I went to console his father. He said to me," I was longing for his death." I said, O Abu Ishaq, how could you say something like that while you enjoy such a status among the scholars? Your son was grown up, memorized the Qur'an and was knowledgeable in Fiqh and Hadith. He said, I saw in a dream as if we it was the Day of Judgment and there were many children who are carrying cups of water and met the people to give them water. The Day was very hot and I said to one of them, give me some water. He looked at me and said you are my father. I said who are you? He said, we are the children who died in the religion of Islam and we foreran our fathers to give them the water to drink. For this reason I hoped for his death." Muslim reported on the authority of Abu Hasan who said that, "I said to Abu Hurairah talk with us about something that may relieve us from our sadness concerning our dead.” He said, they are the boys of Paradise and they meet their fathers or their parents and catch their clothes or hands and don't leave them until they enter Paradise.” 3
قال مالك بن دينار رضي الله عنه: «في أول حياتي انغمستُ في كل أنواع اللهو وشرب الخمر. اشتريتُ جارية وجامعتُها، فولدت بنتاً. وقد أحببتُ البنت حباً حقيقياً. كبرت وبدأت تمشي.
Malik Ibn Dinar (may Allah be pleased with him) said, " At the be ginning of my life I indulged in every type of amusement and wine drinking. I bought a slave girl and I had a sexual intercourse with her and she gave birth to a girl. I loved the girl in the true sense of the word. She grew up and started to walk.
حتى إذا أردتُ أن أشرب كانت تأتي وتصبّ الماءَ بين يديّ. ولما بلغت سنتين ماتت، فحزنتُ حزنًا شديدًا وكنت متألمًا لوفاتها. ثم لما كانت ليلةُ الرابع عشر من شعبان نمتُ وكنتُ مُتعَبًا جدًّا، فرأيتُ في منامي كأنّنا في يوم القيامة، وقد بُعثتُ من قبري. فإذا بتنّينٍ يتبعني ويريد أن يأكلني. فهربتُ منه، لكنه لم يتركني. وكلما أسرعتُ في الجري أسرع هو، وكنتُ شديدَ الخوف. وفي طريقي مررتُ برجل كبير السنّ، عليه ثيابٌ نظيفةٌ طاهرة، وجسمُه ضعيف. فقلت: أناشدك أن تحميني من هذا التنين الذي يريد أن يأكلني ويهلكني. فقال لي: يا بُنيّ، أنا رجل كبير السنّ ولا أستطيع مواجهة هذا التنين، ولكن امضِ واسرع، وليحفظك الله منه. فجريتُ هاربًا، وهو يتبعني. وكدتُ أقع في طبقات النار وهي تغلي، وكنتُ على وشك السقوط فيها. فسمعتُ من يقول: أنقذوا هذا الشقيَّ قبل أن يصل إليه عدوُّه. فعندئذٍ فُتحت الأبوابُ وأُزيحت الستور، وإذا بأطفال، وجوهُهم كالقمر، ينظرون إليّ. وكانت ابنتي بينهم، فلما رأتني نزلت إلى درجٍ من نور، وضربت التنين بيدها اليمنى، فهرب التنينُ على إثر ذلك. فجلست في حِجري وقالت: يا أبي، ﴿أَلَمْ يَأْنِ لِلَّذِينَ آمَنُوا أَن تَخْشَعَ قُلُوبُهُمْ لِذِكْرِ اللَّهِ وَمَا نَزَلَ مِنَ الْحَقِّ﴾ (الحديد: ١٦)
Whenever I wanted to drink she came and poured it before my hands. When she was two years old she died and I was very distressed and sad because of her death. Then when it was the fourteenth night of Sha'ban I slept and I was very intoxicated. I saw in my dream as if we are on the Day of Judgment and I was raised from my grave. Then there was a dragon following me and wanted to eat me. I fled from it but it did not leave me alone. The more I ran fast, the more it hurried and I was very fearful. On my way I passed by an old man with a clean and pure clothes and feeble body. I said, I entreat you to protect me from this tannin which want to eat and destroy me. He said to me, O my son I an a very old man and I am not able to face this tannin. But pass and hurry and may Allah protect you against it. I ran away and it. Followed me. I was very near to the layers of the fire while they were boiling and I was about to fall into them. I heard someone saying; rescue this wretched person before his enemy reaches him. Thereupon the gates were open and curtains were pulled up and there were children, with faces like the moon, looking at me. My daughter was amongst them and when she saw me she went down to a scale of light and beat it with her its right hand and consequently the tannin ran away. She sat in my lap and said, O my father, {has not the time arrived for the believers that their hearts in all humility should engage in the remembrance of Allah and of the truth which has been revealed ( to them)} (AI-Haddid: 16)
قُلْتُ لَهَا: يَا بُنَيَّتِي، هَلْ تَعْرِفِينَ الْقُرْآنَ الْعَظِيمَ؟ فَقَالَتْ: نَحْنُ نَعْرِفُهُ أَكْثَرَ مِنْكَ. قُلْتُ: يَا بُنَيَّتِي، مَاذَا تَفْعَلْنَ هُنَا؟ قَالَتْ: نَحْنُ أَطْفَالُ الْمُسْلِمِينَ الَّذِينَ مَاتُوا وَوُضِعْنَا هُنَا إِلَى يَوْمِ الْقِيَامَةِ نَنْتَظِرُكَ. فَسَأَلْتُهَا: يَا بُنَيَّتِي، مَا هَذَا التِّنِّينُ الَّذِي يُرِيدُ أَنْ يُهْلِكَنِي؟ فَقَالَتْ: يَا أَبِي، هَذِهِ أَعْمَالُكَ السَّيِّئَةُ، قَوَّيْتَهَا حَتَّى أَرَادَتْ أَنْ تُهْلِكَكَ. فَسَأَلْتُهَا: مَنْ هَذَا الرَّجُلُ الضَّعِيفُ؟ فَقَالَتْ: هَذِهِ أَعْمَالُكَ الصَّالِحَةُ، أَضْعَفْتَهَا حَتَّى عَجَزَتْ عَنْ مُوَاجَهَةِ أَعْمَالِكَ السَّيِّئَةِ. فَتُبْ إِلَى اللهِ وَلَا تَكُنْ مِنَ الْهَالِكِينَ. ثُمَّ اسْتَيْقَظْتُ مِنْ نَوْمِي وَتُبْتُ إِلَى اللهِ مِنْ تِلْكَ السَّاعَةِ.
I said to her, "O my daughter do you know the Glorious Qur'an? She replied, "We know it more than you, I said, "O my daughter, what do you do here? We are the Muslim children who died and were placed here until the Day of Judgment awaiting you." I asked her, "O my daughter what is this dragon who wants to destroy me? She said, "O my father, this is your odious deeds you strengthened it until it wants to destroy you. I asked her who is this feeble man? She said, "This is your good deeds you weakened it until it was unable to face your odious deeds. So repent to Allah and be not among those who are destroyed." Then I rose from my sleep and I repented to Allah from this time.
فتأمّل (رحمك الله) نعمةَ موتِ الأطفال، ذكورًا كانوا أو إناثًا، وهم صغارٌ. فإنّ لوالديهم أجرَهم إذا صبروا واحتسبوا عند الله، وقالوا: الحمدُ لله، إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون. ولهم ما وعدهم الله، {الَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ} (البقرة: ١٥٦)
Therefore, contemplate (may Allah have mercy towards you) the blessing of the death of children, whether male or female, while they are younger. Their parents will have the reward of them if they are patient and seek the compensation from Allah and say, praise be to Allah, to Allah we belong and to him is our return. They, in return, have what Allah has promised them, {Who say, when afflicted with calamity: to Allah we belong.} (AI-Baqarah: 156)
أي أننا وأموالنا لله، وله الحق أن يتصرف فيها كما يشاء. وإليه مرجعنا." وهذا إقرارٌ بأن كل شيء سيفنى، وأن كل شيء سيعود إلى الله.
i.e. we and our property is for Allah and He has the right to dispose with it as He wills. And to Him is our return." this is an admission that every thing will be destroyed and every thing will return to Allah.
عَنْ ثَوْبَانَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ: «مَا يُصِيبُ الْمُسْلِمَ مِنْ مُصِيبَةٍ إِلَّا بِذَنْبٍ يُكَفِّرُهُ عَنْهُ، أَوْ بِمَا يُعَلِّمُهُ» ... ﷺ
On the authority of Thawban (may Allah be pleased with him) who said, "The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "Never is a person afflicted with calamity unless it is due to two things, either because of a sin which will not be forgiven except by this calamity or because of a certain status which he will never attain except through this calamity.” 1
قال سعيد بن جبير: "أُعطيت هذه الأمة عند المصيبة شيئاً لم يُعطَه الأنبياء الذين قبلها، أي قوله تعالى: {إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ}." ثم قال: "ولو أُعطيه الأنبياء لأُعطيه يعقوبُ عليه السلام، الذي قال: {يَا أَسَفَى عَلَىٰ يُوسُفَ}."
Sa'id Ibn Jubair said, "This nation was given something at time of calamity which the Prophets preceding it were deprived of i.e., {To Allah we belong and to Him is our return." He proceeded to say, "If the Prophets were granted with it, it would be given to Jacob (pbuh) who said, "How great is my grief for Yusuf} (Yusuf: 84)
عَنْ أُمِّ سَلَمَةَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا قَالَتْ: سَمِعْتُ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ يَقُولُ: «مَا مِنْ مُسْلِمٍ تُصِيبُهُ مُصِيبَةٌ فَيَقُولُ: إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ، اللَّهُمَّ أْجُرْنِي فِي مُصِيبَتِي وَأَخْلِفْ لِي خَيْرًا مِنْهَا، إِلَّا أَخْلَفَ اللَّهُ لَهُ خَيْرًا مِنْهَا». قَالَتْ: فَلَمَّا تُوُفِّيَ أَبُو سَلَمَةَ قُلْتُ: أَيُّ الْمُسْلِمِينَ خَيْرٌ مِنْ أَبِي سَلَمَةَ؟ ثُمَّ قُلْتُهَا، فَأَخْلَفَ اللَّهُ لِي رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ.
On the authority of Umm Salamah (may Allah be pleased with her) who said, I heard the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) saying, "Never is a person afflicted with a calamity and say, "To Allah we belong and to him is our return. 0 Allah! Reward me in my calamity and compensate me with something better than it, and Allah not reward him and compensate him with something better than it." Umm Salamah said, when Abu Salamah died, I said, who is better than Abu Salamah then I said it and Allah compensated me with the Messenger of Allah (pbuh).” 2
عن الشعبي قال: قال شريح: إذا أُصبتُ بمصيبة، حمدتُ الله على أربع: حمدتُه أنها لم تكن أعظم مما هي، وحمدتُه أنه رزقني الصبر عليها، وحمدتُه أنه وفقني لأن أرجو الثواب عليها، وحمدتُه أنها لم تكن في دِيني.
قال الله تعالى: {أُولَٰئِكَ عَلَيْهِمْ صَلَوَاتٌ مِّن رَّبِّهِمْ وَرَحْمَةٌ ۖ وَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُهْتَدُونَ} [البقرة: ١٥٧]
On the authority of AI-Shu'bi who said, Shuraih said, when I have been afflicted with a calamity. I thank Allah four times, I thank Him that He did not afflict me with something more grievous than it, I thank Him for granting me patience for it. I thank Him that he helped me to review what I hope of reward and I thank Him that he did not make it in my religion. Allah the Almighty said, {They are those on whom (descended) blessings from their Lord, and mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.} (AI-Baqarah: 157)
هنا تعني الصلوات الرحمة والمغفرة. {أولئك هم المهتدون} أي: هم الذين وُفِّقوا لمراجعة أعمالهم وأفعالهم. ويُقال أيضًا: إنهم الذين هُدُوا إلى الجنة والثواب.
Here blessings mean mercy and forgiveness. {They are the ones that receive guidance} means, they are the ones who are guided to review their works and deeds. It is also said that they are the ones who are guided to Paradise and rewards.
عَنْ سَعِيدِ بْنِ الْمُسَيَّبِ، عَنْ عُمَرَ بْنِ الْخَطَّابِ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ
One the authority of Sa'id Ibn AI-Musayyab from 'Umar Ibn AI Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him)
من قال في تفسيره لقوله تعالى: {أُولَٰئِكَ عَلَىٰ هُدًى مِّن رَّبِّهِمْ ۖ وَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ}، ما أعظم بركتهم؟ وقال أيضاً: {أُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُهْتَدُونَ}، ما أعظم هذه المرتبة؟ ١
who said in his comment on, {They are the ones on whom (descended blessings from their Lord, and mercy}, how blessed they are. He said also, {they are the ones that receive guidance.} how blessed is this promotion. 1
أما من أصيب بمصيبة فأظهر عدم رضاه بالنياحة والصراخ بصوت عالٍ، وضرب الخدود، وشق الجيوب، وتشعيث الشعر، والحلق، أو القطع، أو نتف الشعر، فإنه يستجلب غضب الله ولعنته على نفسه، سواء كان رجلاً أو امرأة.
As for the person who is afflicted with a calamity and he displayed his dissatisfaction through wailing and bursting in loud lamenting, slapping one's cheeks, ripping one's pockets, dishevelling, shaving, cutting off, or plucking out one's hair. He will invoke Allah's wrath and curse upon himself whether he is a man or a woman.
وقد رُوي أيضًا أن ضرب الفخذ عند المصيبة يُحبط أجر الإنسان.
It is also reported that beating over one's thighs at the time of calamity deprives the person the reward.
وَرُوِيَ أيضاً أنَّه قال: «مَن أُصيبَ بمُصيبةٍ فشَقَّ ثوبَه، أو لَطَمَ وجهَه، أو نَتَفَ شعرَه، فكأنَّما يُشبِهُ مَن أخذَ سهمَه وأرادَ أنْ يُحاربَ اللهَ». وقد تقدَّم أنَّ اللهَ لا يُعذِّبُ الناسَ بدمعِ العينِ ولا بحُزنِ القلبِ، وإنَّما يُعذِّبُهم بهذا، وأشارَ إلى لسانِه، أو يرحمُ، وأنَّ الميتَ يُعذَّبُ ببكاءِ الحيِّ عليه. وقد تقدَّم أيضاً أنَّ الميتَ يُعذَّبُ بما نِيحَ عليه. فإذا قالت المرأةُ: يا ناصِرَاهُ، أو يا كاسِيَاهُ، أو يا مُعينَاهُ، عُذِّبَ الميتُ، وقيل له: أأنتَ ناصِرُها؟ أأنتَ مُعينُها؟ أأنتَ كاسيها؟ ولهذا لا يجوزُ النَّوحُ بالصَّوتِ العالي؛ لأنَّه يُهيِّجُ الحُزنَ ويُحرِّكُ على الصَّبرِ، كما أنَّه يُنافي الرِّضا بقضاءِ اللهِ والاستسلامَ لأمرِه.
It is also reported that, "Whoever is afflicted with a calamity and he tears his clothes, slaps his face, rips his pockets or plucks out his hair, he resembles the one who takes his arrow and wants to fight Allah." It is previously mentioned that Allah does not torture the people because of the tears of the eyes or the grief of the heart. Rather He tortures them for the returns of their tongues and what they say at the time of affliction of loud lamenting and crying. It is also previously mentioned that the dead is tortured with what he was lamented with. So, if the woman laments and says O my sustainer, O my helper, or the one who clothes me, the person will be tortured and it will be said to him, are you her sustainer, are you her helper, are you the one who clothes her? Therefore, loud lamenting is not allowed for it enraged the grief and encourages impatience. It "also goes against the satisfaction with Allah's destiny and submitting to Allah's orders.
قال صالح المري: كنت ذات يوم من أيام الخميس عند المساء بين القبور فغلبني النوم، فرأيت في منامي كأن القبور قد انشقت، وكأن الموتى قد بُعثوا فجلسوا في حِلَق كثيرة، وكان عليهم صفاف مغطاة قد نزلت. وكان فيهم شاب يُعذَّب بأنواع من العذاب. فأتيته وسألته: يا فتى، لماذا تُعذَّب من بين هؤلاء القوم؟ فقال لي: يا صالح، أناشدك أن تُبلِّغ ما سأقوله لك، وتؤدي الأمانة، وترحمني فتنقذني من غمّي، جعلك الله تعالى ممن يحمل لي النجاة. إنني لما مت جمعت أمي كثيراً من النساء، فكنّ يندبن ويولولن عليّ كل يوم.
Salih AI-Mari said, once one Thursday evening I was among the graves and sleep overcome me. I saw in my dream as if the graves were cracked and the dead were raised and sat in many sessions (circles) and upon them there were covered plates descended. There was amongst them a young man who was tormented with all types of torture. I went to him and asked, O young man, why are you tortured from amongst these people? He said to me, O Salih, I entreat you to transfer what I will say to you and pay the trust arid be merciful to rescue me from my grief, may Allah the Almighty make you the one who will bring me salvation. When I died and my mother gathered many women and lamented and wailed over me every day.
كنتُ أُعذَّبُ بعويلهم، وأحاطت بي النار من كل جانب بسبب ما قالوه. فلا جزاها الله بخير بسببي. ثم أخذ يبكي حتى بكيتُ لحاله. ثم قال: يا صالح، اذهب إلى أمي، وأخبرني عن مكانها، وقل لها: لِمَ تعذّبين ابنك؟ لقد ربّتني وحمَتني من المصائب، فلما مِتُّ ألقتني في العذاب. يا أمي، لو رأيتِ حالي، والسلاسل في عنقي، والأغلال في قدميّ، وملائكة العذاب يضربونني، لرَحِمتِني. فإن لم تتركي ما تقولينه من النواح والعويل، فسيحكم الله بيني وبينك يوم القيامة. قال صالح: استيقظتُ خائفًا، ومكثتُ في مكاني حتى وقت الفجر. وفي الصباح ذهبتُ إلى هذه القرية، ولم يكن همّي إلا أن أصل إلى بيت أم هذا الشاب، فسألتُ عنها حتى وصلتُ إليها.
I was tormented with their wailing and the fire surrounded me from all directions because of what they said. May Allah not reward her with any good because of me. Then he started weeping until I wept due to his state. He then said O Salih go to my mother, and he told me about her place, and say to her, why do you torment your son? She brought me up and protected me against misfortunes and when I died she threw me into the torture. O my mother, if you saw my state, the chains in my neck, the cuffs in my feet, and the angels of torture beating me, you will be merciful towards me. If you do not give up what you say of wailing and lamenting, Allah will judge between you and me on the Day of Judgment. Salih said, I woke up in fear and stayed in my place until the time of dawn. In the morning, I went to this village and I had no concern except to reach the house of the mother of this young man. I asked about her and I reached her.
كان باب بيتها مسودًّا، وكان يُسمع من خارج البيت صوت النَّدب والعويل. فطرقتُ الباب، فخرجت امرأةٌ عجوزٌ وقالت: ماذا تريد؟ قلتُ: أريد أمَّ الشابِّ الذي مات. فقالت: وماذا تريد منها؟ إنها مشغولةٌ بحزنها. قلتُ لها: نادِها، فإن معي رسالةً لها من ابنها. فدخلت وأخبرتها، فخرجت الأمُّ وعليها ثيابٌ سوداء، وكان وجهها أسودَ من كثرة النَّدب والبكاء. فسألتني: من أنت؟
The door of her house was blackened and the sound of lamenting and wailing was heard from outside of the house. I knocked the door and there came an old woman and said what do you want? I said, I want the mother of the youth who died. She asked what do you want from her? She is engaged with her grief. I said to her summon her for I have a message for her from her son. She entered and told her. The mother came out wearing black clothes and her face was black out of oft wailing and weeping. She asked me who I was?
قلتُ: أنا صالح المري. البارحة كنتُ عند القبور، وقد حصل لي كذا وكذا مع ابنك.
I said, I am Salih AI Mari. Yesterday I was at the graves and so and so have happened to me with your son.
رأيتُه يُعذَّب ويقول: يا أمّاه، رَبَّيتِني وحفظتِني من المكاره، وعندما مِتُّ أَلقَيتِني في العذاب. إن لم تَكُفّي عمّا تقولين من النياحة والنَّدب، فإن الله سيحكم بيني وبينك يوم القيامة. فلما سمعت ذلك أُغمي عليها.
I saw him tortured and saying, O my mother, you brought me up and protected me against misfortunes and when I died you threw me into the torture. If you do not give up what you say of wailing and lamenting, Allah will judge between you and me on the Day of Judgment. Upon hearing that, she fell unconscious.
لَمَّا أَفَاقَتْ جَعَلَتْ تَبْكِي بُكَاءً شَدِيدًا وَقَالَتْ: يَا بُنَيَّ، إِنَّهُ عَزِيزٌ عَلَيَّ، وَلَوْ عَلِمْتُ لَمَا فَعَلْتُهُ، وَأَتُوبُ إِلَى اللَّهِ مِمَّا صَنَعْتُ. ثُمَّ دَخَلَتْ بَيْتَهَا وَبَدَّلَتْ ثِيَابَهَا، وَأَعْطَتْنِي كِيسًا مَلْآنَ دَرَاهِمَ، وَقَالَتْ: يَا صَالِحُ، تَصَدَّقْ بِهَذِهِ الدَّرَاهِمِ عَنِ ابْنِي.
When she restored her state, she grievously wept and said Omy son it is so cherished to me and if I knew, I would never do it and I repent to Allah from my doing. Then she entered her house, changed her clothes and gave me a suite filled with Dirhams and said, O Salih, give these Dirhams in charity on behalf of my son.
صالح ودّعها، ودعا الله لها، ثم مضى وتصدّق بالدراهم. وفي ليلة الخميس التالية ذهبتُ إلى المقابر كما كنتُ أفعل، ونمتُ، فرأيتُ في منامي أن أهل المقبرة قاموا من قبورهم وجلسوا حِلَقًا، ونزلت عليهم الصحاف.
Salih said goodbye to her, supplicated to Allah for her, went away and gave the dirhams in charity. On the night of the next Thursday, I went to the graves as I used to do and I slept. I saw in my dream that the people in the cemetery rose from their graves and sat in circles and upon them the plates were descended.
كان الشاب سعيداً جداً ومَرِحاً بينهم، فقُدِّم إليه طبق، فأخذه.
The young man was very happy and delightful amongst them and to him there came a plate and he took it.
فلما رآني تقدم نحوي وقال: يا صالح، جزاك الله عني خير الجزاء، فقد خفف الله العزيز عني العذاب لأن أمي تركت النياحة والعويل، ووصل إليّ أجر الصدقة. فقال صالح: ما هذه الصحاف؟ قال: هذه هدايا الأحياء لموتاهم من الصدقة وتلاوة القرآن والدعاء، فتنزل عليهم كل ليلة جمعة. ويقال: هذه هدية فلان إليك. فارجع إلى أمي وسلّم عليها وقل لها: جزاك الله عني خير الجزاء، فقد وصل إليّ أجر صدقتك عني، وستلحقين بنا عن قريب، فتهيئي لذلك. قال صالح: فاستيقظت، وجئت بيت أم هذا الشاب بعد أيام، فوجدت نعشاً عند بابه، فسألت: لمن هذا النعش الموضوع؟
When he saw me, he advanced towards me and said, O Salih, may Allah reward you in the best way for me, Allah the Almighty relieved me from the torture because my mother gave up wailing and lamenting. The reward of charity also reached me. Sahih said, what are these plates? These are the presents of the living people to their dead, from charity, recitation of the Qur'an and supplication. They descended upon them every night of thus. It is said this is the present of so and so to you. So, return to my mother and send peace upon her and say to her may Allah reward you in the best way for me. I received the reward of your charity on behalf of me and you will join us soon, so prepare yourself. Salih said, "I awake and come to the house of the mother of this youth after some days. I found a bier at its door. I asked for whom this bier is placed?
قالوا: لأم الغلام. فصلّيت عليها ودُفنت بجانب ابنها في هذا القبر، ودعوتُ الله لهما ثم انصرفت. نسأل الله أن يتوفانا ونحن مسلمون، وأن يلحقنا بالصالحين، وأن يقينا النار، إنه جوادٌ كريم، توّابٌ رحيم.
They replied, for the mother of the youth. I offered prayer upon her and she was buried beside her son in this grave. I supplicated Allah for them and went away. We ask Allah to cause us to die while we are Muslims and join us to the righteous people and protect us from the Fire, for He is Ever-Generous, Ever Relenting and Ever-Merciful.