Bolaning tarbiyasi onaning huquqi va vazifasi bo'lib, u musulmon bo'lsin yoki bo'lmasin, bola shu parvarishga muhtoj bo'lgan vaqtda shunday davom etadi. Bola bu parvarishga muhtoj bo'lmay qolganda esa, vaziyat ko'rib chiqiladi. Agar ota-onaning ikkalasi ham musulmon bo'lsa, o'g'il yoki qiz bola ular ikkalasidan kimning yonida yashashni xohlashini o'zi tanlaydi va u erkak yoki ayol bo'lishidan qat'i nazar, tanlagan kishisining yoniga qo'shiladi. Agar ulardan biri musulmon bo'lmasa, ular orasida tanlov bo'lmaydi, balki bola musulmon ota-onasining yoniga qo'shiladi.

Custody of the child is a right and duty upon the mother, irrespective of whether she is a Muslim or not as long as the child needs this care. If the child no longer needs the care, then the situation is examined. If both of the parents are Muslim then the child, whether boy or girl, chooses whomever they would like to live with, and they will join whomever they choose, irrespective of whether that was the man or woman. If one of them is non-Muslim, then there is no choice between them; and they rather will join the Muslim parent.

Ushbu maqolaning dalili Abdulloh ibn Amr ibn al-Os rivoyat qilgan hadisdir:

The evidence for this article is what was narrated by Abdullah Bin Amr b. Al-‘As:

. أَنَّ امْرَأَةً قَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللهِ، إِنَّ ابْنِي هَذَا كَانَ بَطْنِي لَهُ وِعَاءً، وَثَدْيِي لَهُ « سِقَاءً، وَحِجْرِي لَهُ حِوَاءً، وَإِنَّ أَبَاهُ طَلَّقَنِي وَأَرَادَ أَنْ يَ نْ تَزِعَهُ مِنِّي، فَ قَالَ لَهَا رَسُولُ اللَّهِ » أَنْتِ أَحَقُّ بِهِ مَا لَمْ تَ نْكِحِي :.

. أَنَّ امْرَأَةً قَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللهِ، إِنَّ ابْنِي هَذَا كَانَ بَطْنِي لَهُ وِعَاءً، وَثَدْيِي لَهُ « سِقَاءً، وَحِجْرِي لَهُ حِوَاءً، وَإِنَّ أَبَاهُ طَلَّقَنِي وَأَرَادَ أَنْ يَ نْ تَزِعَهُ مِنِّي، فَ قَالَ لَهَا رَسُولُ اللَّهِ » أَنْتِ أَحَقُّ بِهِ مَا لَمْ تَ نْكِحِي :.

Bir ayol dedi: “Ey Allohning Elchisi ﷺ, bu mening o‘g‘lim, qornim uni ko‘tardi, ko‘kragim unga suv qirbasi, bag‘rim esa unga qo‘riq. Uning otasi meni talоq qildi va uni mendan tortib olmoqchi”. Shunda u (ﷺ) dedi: “Agar turmushga chiqmasang, u sendan ko‘ra haqliroqsan”. (Abu Dovud va Hokim rivoyat qilgan, Hokim uni sahih deb hisoblagan, az-Zahabiy esa buni tasdiqlagan.) Bu shuni ko‘rsatadiki, hali emizishga muhtoj bo‘lgan bola ustida onaning haqi ko‘proq bo‘ladi, chunki Elchi ﷺ uning turmushga chiqmaguncha bolani emizishini hukm qildi va bolaga tanlov berilmadi, bu esa uning hali emizishga muhtojligini bildiradi. Ibn Abu Shayba Umar (roziyallohu anhu) dan sahih isnod bilan, ishonchli rivoyat qiluvchilar orqali rivoyat qilgan: u Ummu Osimni talоq qildi, so‘ngra Osim uning bag‘rida ekanida unning oldiga kelib, uni undan olmoqchi bo‘ldi. Ikkovi bahslashdi, to bola yig‘lay boshlaguncha. Shunda ular Abu Bakr as-Siddiq (roziyallohu anhu) huzuriga bordilar, u dedi: “Uning tegishi, bag‘ri va hidi, to katta bo‘lib, o‘zi tanlay olguncha, sendan ko‘ra unga yaxshiroqdir”. Demak, hali emizishga muhtoj kichik bola onaning haqi bo‘lib qoladi va bu unga majburiydir, xuddi shunday uning onasi va buvisi hamda hizonat (tarbiya) haqqiga ega bo‘lgan barcha ayollarga ham.

“A woman said “O Messenger of Allah (saw), this is my son whom my stomach carried, my breast is a water-skin for him, and my lap is a guard for him. His father has divorced me and wants to take him away from me”. So he said “You have more right to him as long as you do not remarry”” (reported by Abu Dawud and Al-Hakim who authenticated it, and Al-Dhahabi confirmed it). This indicates that the mother has more right to the child while they still require nursing, since the Messenger (saw) ruled for her to continue nursing him as long as she was not married, and did not give the child the choice, which indicates that he still required nursing. It is narrated by Ibn Abi Shaybah from Umar (ra) with an authentic chain whose reporters are all trustworthy that he divorced Umm ‘Asim, then came to her while ‘Asim was in her lap, and wanted to take him from her. The two of them argued until the young boy began crying, and so they went to Abu Bakr as-Siddiq (ra) who said “Her touch, lap and smell are better for him than you, until he grows up and then can choose for himself”. Accordingly the young child who still needs nursing remains the mother’s right and it is obligatory upon her and similarly upon her mother and grandmother, and upon every women from those who have the right of custody.

Bola katta bo'lib, emizishdan ko'ra katta yoshga yetganda — ya'ni bolaning emizikka muhtoj emasligini tekshirish orqali (bu bolalar o'rtasida, ularning sharoitiga qarab farq qiladi: bir o'g'il bola bunga muhtoj bo'lmasligi mumkin va u besh yoshda bo'lgan, boshqa bola esa yoshroq yoki kattaroq bo'lganda, bu esa mutaxassisning fikriga ko'ra bo'lishi kerak) — shunga asoslanib, agar ular emizikka muhtoj bo'lmasa, ota-ona o'rtasida tanlov huquqi beriladi; Abu Hurayra rivoyat qilgan.

When the child becomes older, such that they are above the age of nursing which is by confirming whether he can do without it or not – which differs between children depending upon their circumstances – so a boy may not require it and he was five years old, and another when they were younger or older, and should be according to an expert’s opinion. Based upon that, if they were not reliant upon nursing they are given the choice between the parents; Abu Hurayrah reported.

Nabiy ﷺ bir bolani otasi bilan onasi o'rtasida tanlov qilishga ixtiyor berdi ﷺ. (Ahmad va At-Termiziy rivoyat qilgan, u uni sahih deb hukm qilgan.) Abu Dovud esa Abu Hurayradan rivoyat qilgan, Ibn Hibbon uni sahih deb hukm qilgan rivoyatni keltirgan:

. أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ « » خَ يَّ رَ غُلامًا بَ يْنَ أَبِيهِ وَأُمِّهِ “The Prophet gave a boy the choice between his mother and father” (reported by Ahmad and Al-Tirmidhi who authenticated it). And Abu Dawud reported a narration from Abu Hurayrah that Ibn Hibban authenticated:

. أَنِّي سَمِعْتُ امْرَأَةً جَاءَتْ إِلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ...« وَأَنَا قَاعِدٌ عِنْدَهُ فَ قَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، إِنَّ زَوْجِي يُرِيدُ أَنْ يَذْهَبَ بِابْنِي وَقَدْ سَقَانِي مِنْ بِئْرِ أَبِي عِنَ بَةَ وَقَدْ ن فََعَنِي، فَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ : ... هَذَا أَبُوكَ وَهَذِهِ أُمُّكَ فَخُذْ بِيَدِ أَي هِمَا شِئْتَ، فَأَخَذَ بِيَدِ أُمِّهِ » فَانْطَلَقَتْ بِهِ .

. أَنِّي سَمِعْتُ امْرَأَةً جَاءَتْ إِلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ...« وَأَنَا قَاعِدٌ عِنْدَهُ فَ قَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، إِنَّ زَوْجِي يُرِيدُ أَنْ يَذْهَبَ بِابْنِي وَقَدْ سَقَانِي مِنْ بِئْرِ أَبِي عِنَ بَةَ وَقَدْ ن فََعَنِي، فَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ : ... هَذَا أَبُوكَ وَهَذِهِ أُمُّكَ فَخُذْ بِيَدِ أَي هِمَا شِئْتَ، فَأَخَذَ بِيَدِ أُمِّهِ » فَانْطَلَقَتْ بِهِ .

“Men Payg‘ambar ﷺning huzurida o‘tirgan edim, bir ayol kelib dedi: “Ey Allohning Elchisi ﷺ, erim o‘g‘limni olib ketmoqchi, holbuki u menga Abu ‘Inaba quduqidan suv olib keladi va menga yordam beradi”. Shunda Payg‘ambar ﷺ dedi: “Bu sening otang, bu esa onang, ikkovidan qaysi birining qo‘lidan ushlashni xohlasang, shuni ushla”. Shunda u onasining qo‘lidan ushladi va ayoli u bilan birga ketdi.”

“While I was sitting with the Prophet a woman came and said: O Messenger of Allah (saw), my husband wants to take my son, and he brings me water from the well of Abu ‘Inaba, and helps me, and so the Prophet said…This is your father and this is your mother, so take the hand of whichever of the two you wish. So he took the hand of his mother and so she left with him.”.

Bu dalillar shuni ko'rsatadiki, bola — o'g'il bo'lsin yoki qiz bo'lsin — emizish va parvarish talab qilmaydigan yoshga yetganida, u uch yoshda bo'lsinmi yoki undan katta bo'lsinmi, ya'ni endi emizishga muhtoj bo'lmasa, uni onasi bilan otasi o'rtasida tanlash huquqi beriladi. Agar bola hali emizishga muhtoj bo'lsa, hukm onaning foydasiga chiqariladi va bolaga tanlash huquqi berilmaydi.

These evidences indicate that once the child, whether boy or girl, reaches the age that they no longer require suckling and nursing, they are given the choice between their mother and father, irrespective of whether they were three years old or more as long as they no longer required nursing. If they still required nursing then the ruling is given in favour of the mother and the child is not given any choice.

Agar ayol, masalan ona, kofir bo'lsa va bolasini emizishni so'rasa, agar bola emizish yoki emizikka muhtoj bo'lish yoshidan kichik bo'lsa, unda u musulmon ayol bilan bir xil tarzda ayolning foydasiga hukm qilinadi; rivoyatning umumiyligi tufayli ular o'rtasida hech qanday farq yo'q.

However, if the women, such as the mother, was a disbeliever and requested to nurse her child, then if they were lower than the age of suckling or requiring nursing then the child is ruled in her favour in the same way as the Muslim woman, with no difference between them due to the generality of the narration.

. » أَنْتِ أَحَقُّ بِهِ مَا لَمْ تَ نْكِحِي « .

. » أَنْتِ أَحَقُّ بِهِ مَا لَمْ تَ نْكِحِي « .

“Sizga u bilan bog‘liq haq ko‘proq, agar qayta turmushga chiqmasangiz”. Bola emizish yoshidan oshganda, ya’ni u emizishga muhtoj bo‘lmaydigan yoshga yoki undan katta bo‘lganda, bola tanlash huquqiga ega bo‘lmaydi, balki musulmon ota-onaga beriladi. Agar ayol musulmon bo‘lsa, bola unga beriladi; agar erkak musulmon bo‘lsa, bola unga beriladi, Allohning (SWT) quyidagi so‘zlariga binoan.

“You have more right to him as long as you do not remarry”. As for when the child is above the age of nursing, such that they are at the age or above the age they no longer need to be suckled, and no longer require nursing, then the child is not given the choice but rather is given to the Muslim parent. If the wife was the Muslim then the child would be given to her and if the husband was the Muslim then the child would be given to him, due to His (swt) words.

"Va Alloh (SWT) hech qachon kofirlarga mo‘minlar ustidan yo‘l (g‘alaba) bermaydi" (TMQ 4:141). Va hukm-qarorga ega bo‘lish (himoyachilik) kishiga musulmon ustidan yo‘l beradi. Shuningdek, bu uning (Payg‘ambarning) ﷺ so‘zlari tufaylidir.

“And never will Allah (swt) give the disbelievers over the believers a way [to overcome them].” (TMQ 4:141), and custody gives the custodian a way over the Muslim. Also due to his words.

.» الإِسْلاَمُ يَ عْلُو وَلاَ ي عُْل ى «.

.» الإِسْلاَمُ يَ عْلُو وَلاَ ي عُْل ى «.

"Islom ustundir va uning ustidan hech narsa qilinmaydi", deb Ad-Daraqutniy ‘Oiz al-Muzaniydan hasan isnod bilan rivoyat qilgan. Vasiy esa bolaning ustidadir. Bolani kufrni o‘rgatadigan kofirning tarbiyasi ostida qoldirish joiz emas va shu sababli bola ulardan olib qo‘yiladi.

“Islam is above and nothing is made above it”, reported by Al-Daraqutni from ‘Aith Al-Mazni with a Hasan chain, and the custodian is above the child. Keeping the child under the custody of the disbeliever who will teach them disbelief is not allowed, and for that reason the child is taken from them.

Abu Dovud ‘Abd al-Hamid b. Ja‘fardan, u otasidan, u esa bobosi Rofi‘ b. Sinandan rivoyat qilganlari haqida.

As for what was narrated by Abu Dawud from ‘Abd alHamid b. Ja‘far from his father from his grandfather Rafi‘ b. Sinan that.

فَ قَا لَتِ: ابْ نَتِي، وَهِيَ فَطِيمٌ أَنَّهُ أَسْلَمَ، وَأَبَتِ امْرَأَتُهُ أَنْ تُسْلِمَ، فَأَتَتِ النَّبِيَّ « اقْ عُدْ نَاحِيَةً، وَقَالَ لَهَا: اقْ عُدِي :أَوْ شَبَ هُهُ، وَقَالَ رَافِعٌ: ابْ نَتِي، قَالَ لَهُ النَّبِيُّ نَاحِيَةً، قَالَ: وَأَقْ عَدَ الصَّبِيَّةَ بَ يْ نَ هُمَا، ثُمَّ قَالَ: ادْعُوَاهَا، فَمَالَتِ الصَّبِيَّةُ إِلَى أُمِّهَا، فَ قَالَ » اللَّهُمَّ اهْدِهَا، فَمَالَتِ الصَّبِيَّةُ إِلَى أَبِيهَا فَأَخَذَهَا :النَّبِيُّ .

فَ قَا لَتِ: ابْ نَتِي، وَهِيَ فَطِيمٌ أَنَّهُ أَسْلَمَ، وَأَبَتِ امْرَأَتُهُ أَنْ تُسْلِمَ، فَأَتَتِ النَّبِيَّ « اقْ عُدْ نَاحِيَةً، وَقَالَ لَهَا: اقْ عُدِي :أَوْ شَبَ هُهُ، وَقَالَ رَافِعٌ: ابْ نَتِي، قَالَ لَهُ النَّبِيُّ نَاحِيَةً، قَالَ: وَأَقْ عَدَ الصَّبِيَّةَ بَ يْ نَ هُمَا، ثُمَّ قَالَ: ادْعُوَاهَا، فَمَالَتِ الصَّبِيَّةُ إِلَى أُمِّهَا، فَ قَالَ » اللَّهُمَّ اهْدِهَا، فَمَالَتِ الصَّبِيَّةُ إِلَى أَبِيهَا فَأَخَذَهَا :النَّبِيُّ .

u “u Islomni qabul qildi, lekin xotini ham shunday qilishdan bosh tortdi. Shunda u Payg‘ambar ﷺ huzurlariga borib dedi: “U mening qizim. U emizishni tugatgan yoki tugatish arafasida”. Rofi’ dedi: “U mening qizim”. Payg‘ambar ﷺ unga dedi: “Bir tarafda o‘tir”, xotiniga esa: “Ikkinchi tarafda o‘tir”, dedi. So‘ngra dedi: “Uni chaqiring”. Qiz onasiga og‘di. Shunda Payg‘ambar ﷺ dedi: “Ey Alloh (SWT), uni to‘g‘ri yo‘lga boshla”. Shundan so‘ng qiz otasiga og‘di va u uni oldi”. Bu rivoyatni Al-Hakim sahih deb tasdiqlagan, Al-Dhahabi ham uning fikriga qo‘shilgan. Al-Daraqutniy qizning ismi Umayra ekanini zikr qilgan. Ahmad va Al-Nasa’iy bu rivoyatni boshqa isnod bilan rivoyat qilganlar; Al-Nasa’iy esa uni ‘Abd Al-Hamid ibn Ja’far Al-Ansariydan, u o‘z bobosidan rivoyat qilgan.

“he embraced Islam, and his wife refused to do likewise and so she went to the Prophet and said “She is my daughter. She has finished breastfeeding or is about to”. Rafi’ said “She is my daughter”. The Prophet said to him sit on one side, and told his wife to sit on the other. He then said “Call her”, and the girl inclined to her mother. The Prophet then said “O Allah (swt), guide her”, and then she inclined to her father, and so he took her”. This narration is authenticated by Al-Hakim and Al- Dhahabi agreed with him, and Al-Daraqutni mentioned that the girl’s name was Umayra. Ahmed and Al-Nasa’i both narrated this narration with a different chain, Al-Nasa’i narrated from ‘Abd Al- Hamid b. Ja’far Al-Ansari from his grandfather.

. أَنَّهُ أَسْلَمَ، وَأَبَتِ امْرَأَتُهُ أَنْ تُسْلِمَ، فَجَاءَ ابْنٌ لَهُمَا صَغِيرٌ لَمْ يَ بْ لُغِ الْحُلُمَ، « الأَبَ هَا هُنَا وَالأُمَّ هَا هُنَا، ثُمَّ خَ يَّ رَهُ فَ قَالَ: اللَّهُمَّ اهْدِهِ، فَذَهَبَ إِلَى فَأَجْلَسَ النَّبِيُّ » أَبِيهِ .

. أَنَّهُ أَسْلَمَ، وَأَبَتِ امْرَأَتُهُ أَنْ تُسْلِمَ، فَجَاءَ ابْنٌ لَهُمَا صَغِيرٌ لَمْ يَ بْ لُغِ الْحُلُمَ، « الأَبَ هَا هُنَا وَالأُمَّ هَا هُنَا، ثُمَّ خَ يَّ رَهُ فَ قَالَ: اللَّهُمَّ اهْدِهِ، فَذَهَبَ إِلَى فَأَجْلَسَ النَّبِيُّ » أَبِيهِ .

u aning bobosi islomni qabul qilgan, xotini esa rad etgan, deb. Ularning balog'at yoshiga hali yetmagan kichik o'g'li keldi. Payg'ambar ﷺ otani bir joyga, onani boshqa joyga o'tqazdi, so'ng yosh bolaga tanlov berdi va: "Ey Alloh (SWT), uni to'g'ri yo'lga hidoyat qil", dedi, shunda bola otasining oldiga bordi. Ibn Javziy ikki rivoyat zanjiri o'rtasida, bolaning kichik ekanligini zikr qiluvchi zanjir aniqroq ekanini zikr qiladi.

“that his grandfather embraced Islam, while his wife refused. Thier young son who has not reached puberty yet came. The Prophet sat the father in one place and the mother at another, and then gave the young boy the choice and said “O Allah (swt) guide him”, and so he went to his father”. Ibn Jawzi mentions that between the two chains of narrations the chain that mentions that it was a boy is the more correct.

Elchi (ﷺ) bola tanlagan narsadan rozi bo‘lmadi, balki unga duo qildi va shu tariqa bola o‘zining musulmon otasini tanladi; boshqacha aytganda, bola ikki ota-onadan musulmon bo‘lganiga berildi.

The Messenger (saw) was not content with what the child had chosen, rather he prayed for him and so he chose his Muslim father, or in other words, the child was given to the Muslim of the two parents.